In my last entry I mentioned that during the darkest and most painful periods in my life, I have picked up different hobbies and interests which have taught me valuable lessons about life. In the last couple of years, I have discovered a new passion: photography.
The word "photography" literally means "writing with light". By definition, photography isn't about producing a nice picture. It is a form of communicating, a form of writing if you will. It is using an image to communicate a message. Sometimes the message hits you in the face like a stiff punch. Sometimes it wants you to slow down and ponder. Other times it captures a "moment" and invites you to imagine the rest of the 'story'. But regardless, good photography is about communication. While spoken communication goes from my lips to your ears, photography goes from my eyes to yours.
My interest in photography goes beyond the technical "shop talk" like focal lengths and shutter speeds. (Having said that, I am still a big sucker for the newest and latest gadget that promises to turn me into a Pulitzer Prize winner. Give me a break, I am a guy!) I got into photography because it teaches me to do something that most of us take for granted: Photography teaches me how to see.
Seeing, I have learned, is a decisive, deliberate act. It involves 2 choices: You choose what you see, and you choose what not to see. You make that choice by manipulating the lens on your camera. You zoom in and out to decide what you include and exclude in your image.
A few days ago I caught myself thinking of the past, about the way I was hurt by the church and felt myself sinking into despair. I happened to have my camera with me and I took it out to take some pictures of flowers. The camera forces me to focus and see the beauty around me: I saw the brilliant colors, the perfect texture and shape of each petal, and it occured to me that in this world of ugliness, there is beauty. What I see depends on what lens I decide to look through.
Here are a few shots I took that day: http://picasaweb.google.com/alfred.lam/ADayAtTheNursery
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Lessons learned along the way...
Recently I took stock of where my life has been for the last 20 years or so. During these past 2 decades, there has been 2 or 3 noticable "tough patches"; long periods of time when things were very difficult. As I looked back, I discovered something interesting: During each of these tough periods, the way I coped with life was to develop a new hobby/interest. And each of those hobbies taught me philosophical lessons that made me grow as a person. I thought this may be a good place to share some of those with you...
In the early nineties, I was dealing with a painful situation in my own family. During those days, as a way of escaping the stress, I picked up marathon running. There are a lot of ways in which running a marathon mirrors life. But the one lesson that has stayed with me and is helping me to this day is this: a race, no matter how long, can only be run one step at a time.
A marathon measures 26 miles, 385 yards or 41.195 km. That is roughly the distance between the East end of Scarborough and the West end of Mississauga. That's a long way to run. There are times during the late stages of a marathon when you body is completely out of fuel. Runners call it 'hitting the wall'. When that happens, you cannot think of how many miles is left to the finish line. The only thing you can do is to focus all your mental and physical energies to the most important task at hand: taking the next step. You pick up your foot, move it forward, and put it down. When you have done that, you do it again with your other foot.
One step at a time. These days, it is that training and experience that is getting me through the days. There are days when I wake up and I feel completely spent. I wanted to look back at the past and feel angry. I look ahead to the future and feel fearful and uncertain. On those days, I draw from my marathon running days and remind myself to just focus on one step, one task at a time...
"don't think about the past which you can't change"
"don't think about the future which you can't control"
"don't think about what others say and do which you can't dictate"
"focus on doing this one thing....for now."
I cannot tell you how many times that routine has gotten me through a day. One task at a time, one step at a time.
************
PS: After I finished blogging this entry, it hit me why the imagery of running has always connected with me as a metaphor for my life. Beyond the obvious physical benefits, the one thing that has always drawn me to running is the loneliness of the sport. As a distance runner, you log mile after mile, hour after hour, day after day, running alone. Even in a major marathon race with more than 10,000 participants, you are really running alone. I guess that is how I have always felt - alone.
PS-1: May be that's why the story of 'Footprints" has never resonnated with me...I have never seen that 'second pair' of footprints...
PS-2: If you happen to be running down my street...I'd love to run with you. Please...
In the early nineties, I was dealing with a painful situation in my own family. During those days, as a way of escaping the stress, I picked up marathon running. There are a lot of ways in which running a marathon mirrors life. But the one lesson that has stayed with me and is helping me to this day is this: a race, no matter how long, can only be run one step at a time.
A marathon measures 26 miles, 385 yards or 41.195 km. That is roughly the distance between the East end of Scarborough and the West end of Mississauga. That's a long way to run. There are times during the late stages of a marathon when you body is completely out of fuel. Runners call it 'hitting the wall'. When that happens, you cannot think of how many miles is left to the finish line. The only thing you can do is to focus all your mental and physical energies to the most important task at hand: taking the next step. You pick up your foot, move it forward, and put it down. When you have done that, you do it again with your other foot.
One step at a time. These days, it is that training and experience that is getting me through the days. There are days when I wake up and I feel completely spent. I wanted to look back at the past and feel angry. I look ahead to the future and feel fearful and uncertain. On those days, I draw from my marathon running days and remind myself to just focus on one step, one task at a time...
"don't think about the past which you can't change"
"don't think about the future which you can't control"
"don't think about what others say and do which you can't dictate"
"focus on doing this one thing....for now."
I cannot tell you how many times that routine has gotten me through a day. One task at a time, one step at a time.
************
PS: After I finished blogging this entry, it hit me why the imagery of running has always connected with me as a metaphor for my life. Beyond the obvious physical benefits, the one thing that has always drawn me to running is the loneliness of the sport. As a distance runner, you log mile after mile, hour after hour, day after day, running alone. Even in a major marathon race with more than 10,000 participants, you are really running alone. I guess that is how I have always felt - alone.
PS-1: May be that's why the story of 'Footprints" has never resonnated with me...I have never seen that 'second pair' of footprints...
PS-2: If you happen to be running down my street...I'd love to run with you. Please...
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Thoughts after the earthquake...
"If you go about looking for a God to fill your own 'God-shaped void' inside your heart, you will end up with a 'void-shaped God'".
Not sure where I have seen that quote before (It may be a paraphrase). But I find myself thinking about that a lot these days when I watch the latest news coverage of the Sichuan earthquake.
As I watch the incredible devastation and the loss of lives, it occured to me that surely, if there is a God, His agenda is bigger than sqeezing Himself into the "void's" of different shapes and sizes in each human's heart.
Perhaps the point of a life of faith or a life of calling isn't so much in looking for God to fill the "God-Shaped Vaccum" inside my heart, but for me to look for the "Alfred-Shaped Vaccum" in this world. A need, a space, that God is looking for me to uniquely fill....
Not sure where I have seen that quote before (It may be a paraphrase). But I find myself thinking about that a lot these days when I watch the latest news coverage of the Sichuan earthquake.
As I watch the incredible devastation and the loss of lives, it occured to me that surely, if there is a God, His agenda is bigger than sqeezing Himself into the "void's" of different shapes and sizes in each human's heart.
Perhaps the point of a life of faith or a life of calling isn't so much in looking for God to fill the "God-Shaped Vaccum" inside my heart, but for me to look for the "Alfred-Shaped Vaccum" in this world. A need, a space, that God is looking for me to uniquely fill....
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